photo credit: bolandrotor

An exercise in relaxation.

What I have personally gotten from my dalliances into meditation is that, if I do it with reasonable regularity, I’m less anxious and more alert. Also, during the meditation itself, I remember little things I’ve forgotten in the hustle and bustle of everyday life. I also generally feel quite pleasant, like sort of a warm post-orgasmic contentment. Lastly, I’m able to explore old memories with much clarity and feel a greater appreciation for life and people, which compensates for the built-up misanthropy gained through a day of dealing with people. Meditation (or a less loaded name for it: self-hypnosis) isn’t all that different from mild psychedelics.

Position: My personal preference is lying on my back in bed. Only works when not too tired, or you’ll fall asleep half-way. It is a misconception that meditation requires the lotus position. Any position works.

Breathing: 4 seconds (out) -4 (hold) – 4 (in) – 4 (hold). Variations are plenty.

Next do a round of your senses:

1. Hearing. – Identify every sound. In a quiet room you’ll probably start noticing it isn’t all that quiet.
2. Vision. – If you close your eyes, stay alert, don’t fall asleep. If you keep them opened, relax your eyelids and concentrate on an interesting point.
3. Smell. - Feel the air as you breathe, and any smell it may have.
4. Taste. – Probably not much of that going on, except toothpaste.
5. Touch. – What is your body touching? Feel the pressure and fabrics.
Also, what is the temperature like? How is your sense of balance? These too are sensory impressions.

Don’t take too long, lest you fall asleep. Now for the most important part (and the part which hints at the hypnosis in self-hypnosis), repeat all the following 3 times per body part or make it feel as described:

(just go up your body, always left first when dealing with symmetrical parts:)

Your left foot feels warm and heavy.
Your lower left leg feels warm and heavy.
Your left knee feels warm and heavy.
Your upper left leg feels warm and heavy.
Your right foot feels warm and heavy.
Your lower right leg feels warm and heavy.
Your right knee feels warm and heavy.
Your upper right leg feels warm and heavy.
Your glorious genitals feel warm and heavy.
Your bombin’ behind feels warm and heavy.
Your lower back feels warm and heavy.
Your middle back feels warm and heavy.
Your upper back feels warm and heavy.
Your belly feels warm and heavy.
Your chest feels warm and heavy.
Your left hand feels warm and heavy.
Your lower left arm feels warm and heavy.
Your left elbow feels warm and heavy.
Your upper left arm feels warm and heavy.
Your left shoulder feels warm and heavy.
Your right hand feels warm and heavy.
Your lower right arm feels warm and heavy.
Your right elbow feels warm and heavy.
Your upper right arm feels warm and heavy.
Your right shoulder feels warm and heavy.
Your neck feels warm and heavy.
Your lower jaw feels warm and heavy.
Your upper jaw feels warm and heavy.
Your cheeks feel warm and heavy.
Your nose feels warm and heavy.
Your eyes feel warm and heavy.
Your ears feel warm and heavy.
Your entire head feels warm and heavy.
Your entire body feels warm and heavy.

This should be exceedingly relaxing. The last sentence may have also made you shudder, a certain pleasant feeling rippling through your body. This likely depends on the person.

Now you’re ready to do whatever. You can pretend your thoughts enter your right ear and exit through the left, which is my way of bringing thoughts to a stop. There are many other options. For extra relaxation you can imagine a ball of yellow energy very slowly making its way from your crotch upwards, becoming ever more red and large and fierce, then releasing it back onto the whole of your body when it reaches your crown. You can find endless suggestions and techniques on other websites, depending on what you’d like to accomplish. Meditation is certainly a good starting point for introspection or analysing problems.